The disguise of "kindness"

Consider this for a moment:

Think about the number of times you've self-abandoned in your life.

Yuck! Too many to count. It's just a shitty feeling. It doesn't feel good, and it sneaks up on you like an emotional hangover.

Often we self-abandon under the disguise of "kindness."

Kindness is promoted as something to be spread, and that the world needs more of it.

Yet what happens when being kind translates into abandoning our needs. It seems that kindness is often thought of as something we offer up to others, but what does it look like to be kind to yourself?

Kindness is supposed to be easy, it’s supposed to make you feel good, but being kind to ourselves doesn’t always look that way.

It can be actually be the hardest practice. To take the time to deeply listen to ourselves, and have the courage to act on this.

When you're kind to yourself, sometimes you have to turn people away. You have to say no, cause in reality boundaries are the real kindness in disguise. 

You get to choose yourself over someone else.

So often we are unkind to ourselves because it makes us uncomfortable to put ourselves first, and we are afraid of hurting someone else. Being an n’betweener is often characterized by the need to please everyone…everyone but ourselves.

The pain of feeling othered creates the need to fit in so we compromise ourselves to do so. But I am going to challenge you to find your power.

You can say no and you can speak up (even if it feels super clunky). 

You're allowed to be gentle with yourself. It is a necessity and you have the ability to exercise it. We're so familiar with oppression that when we get a chance to execute our power, we shy away.

Learn to be uncomfortable if it means you are no longer sacrificing yourself. 

You can be kind and a badass ❤️‍🔥

Time to shed that "kind mask."

Hugs

Nora