A simple exercise to stop comparing yourself immediately
Let’s play a game.
Not the typical game you might be thinking about.
I call it the “Swapping Spots” game.
I learned this from a brilliant Danish comedian and actress - Hella Jooff. Not only is she hilarious, but she is also deeply insightful, and she is of course a Black n’betweener (rarely represented in Danish media).
You know that feeling where you get caught in a comparison trap?
That habit of measuring and comparing your life to others creating unrealistic standards?
It’s Wednesday evening, you started watching funny cat videos and somehow ended up on Mary’s IG profile [some stranger with the best profile aesthetic] and find yourself thinking “I wish I had her life”.
Uh-huh?
I feel you. This is a common theme for us n’betweeners. We endlessly compare ourselves to others.
So back to Hella’s game. Here is how it works:
Choose one person you want to trade your life with. Only one.
Swap lives with this one person in all aspects: intelligence, appearance, finance, career, family, dog, children, the whole package. Picture yourself as them fully.
Would you do it?
The answer is most likely: NO.
You quickly realize “Nope, I’m not interested in Mary’s life. I guess I kind of like this about my life.”
We want just a part of their lives, not the whole package.
Hella emphasizes “You can not shop around and change voice with Beyoncé, shoes with Imelda Marcos, intelligence with Anja C. Andersen, the astrophysicist, and breasts with Jamie Lee Curtis”.
So there you have it - the end of comparison games.
Comparison leads to pointless suffering.
Come back to all of you. Hold the both and.
You’re unique. You're wonderful as you are.
Hug
Nora