From Invisible to Invincible (!)

Minority stress is real. That chronic anxiety associated with being “other.”

Having privilege means being invisible. Not invisible as in being erased, but invisible as in being invincible. You cannot be defeated. 

Privilege means: You belong no matter what.

I don’t know about you, but that’s not a familiar feeling to me.  

People living with dominant identities are not called out, or second guessed or questioned for who they are.

They are “the norm.” They don’t stick out. 

And all of us outside this have to obey these made-up norms. We do this by molding, shapeshifting, and overworking etc. Yea, I know you get it.

Tell me, how often do you hear people say? 👇

- “I can’t wait to go to this heterosexual wedding this weekend.”

It just does not happen: you only go to a “gay wedding.” 

Or how often do you hear people say, “I am European American”? You only hear if they are African American or Asian American. 

We constantly get this extra word, this load on us, reminding us that we’re different. We’re “other.”

That we don’t belong.

So as n’betweeners we spend so much time authenticating ourselves. Proving our worth. 

We don’t get to be “a person.” 💔  

We’re “the Indian person.” “The queer person.” “The trans person.” “The immigrant.” 

Or even the Indian, queer, trans immigrant. In other words we get a qualifier. 

Something to qualify our otherness 🤢

This extra word. A seemingly harmless word, yet other people don’t get this qualifier. 

Well here is something powerful about where I am right now.

I’m in a city where nothing about me is “special” or “exotic”. Zero qualifier.

Yes, I’m just a regular-ass person walking down the streets of New York.

I’m definitely not the only person speaking non-English in the supermarket in Bedstuy. I’m definitely not the only culturally confused person at the coffee shop. I’m definitely not the only queer person in the Q subway line.

I’m invisible. 

No one notices me. And it feels daaaamn good. So many parts of me are being reflected.

Maybe I'm even invincible here.

There is no “dominant” here in New York (obviouuusly systems of oppression exist and are perpetuated). But there is something about blending in that just gives me an exhale. 

n’betweeness is everywhere, which allows me to rest in moments.

When do you feel like you most belong?

I’d love you to share a moment with me.

❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜 🖤

Hugs

Nora