Fearing loss?

I don’t know about you but letting go doesn’t come naturally to me. Most of us avoid experiencing loss at all costs.

So we hold on. We latch. We grasp. We may even get desperate. 

What are you struggling to let go of in your life right now?

Maybe you’re struggling letting go of an opportunity, job, relationship or a home.

You cannot imagine your life without this. You think but “it shouldn’t be this way.” 

The problem here is not the potential loss, the real problem is your attachment to "how things should be." 

Any type of loss brutally reminds us of the impermanence in this world. 

Nothing is guaranteed and, trust me, I know that is terrifying. In these times, we’re invited to feel all of the pain and take time to reflect. 

There are two ways to work with impermanence.

You can choose to ask “Why?” Why did this happen? Why build a home if it can just burn down? Why invest in a relationship if it will end? Why get excited for a job if I don’t get it? We feel hopeless, and we focus on the pain, trauma and loss.

Or you can choose to find presence. You can feel the strengthened support of your BIPOC community. You can see the beauty of having built your home. You can lean into the beautiful moments you share with your partner. You can choose to see a job opening as an opportunity to grow rather than a chance to fail. 

Impermanence invites presence.

How can I live life to the fullest in the midst of tragedy you might ask? Fires, shooting, violence, an ongoing genocide.

It’s ok to feel resistant to impermanence.

See if you can maybe find ONE moment of gratitude, one moment of humbleness, one moment of connection with your loved ones.

Let go of obsessing about that picture that you no longer have. Let go of thinking about yesterday and that dumb comment you made to the cashier. Let go worrying you’ll forget how to talk during that presentation you have tomorrow. 

I know this is hard, and I also know you have the innate power to do this. 

You can choose to appreciate the way things are at this very moment. Not what they could be in two months from now or a year from now or, hell, even maybe ten minutes from now. 

Breathe in this moment of presence as you read this right now. 

In this impermanence. In this n’between. Let the uncertainty allow you to completely immerse yourself in the now.

If you’ve lost a loved one, a home or are moving through any grievance process, know that I’m thinking of you and sending you the biggest hug.

💖

Nora